Wall-E review

July 9, 2008

This is the worst anime I have ever seen.
There is no blue spikey hair, no 13-year-old girls with large breasts, no kamehameha blasts, nothing.
Wall-E is a story about two gay robots falling in love. So on top of that, it’s a Yaoi.

I don’t need to futher explain how much this anime blows, stay far away from it.

faggots

faggots

School Days review

July 8, 2008

Girls, with cell phones? I can smell the originality!

Girls, with cell phones? I can smell the originality!

Okay, I know, I’m REALLY scrapping the bottom of the barrel with this title. Let’s get started. (warning: review contains spoilers)

So, how did I like this anime? It sucks, hard. And let me explain why it sucks.

Meet Makoto:

He\'s just full of emtionion
His facial expression rarely changes

Makoto is secretly in love with a girl named Kotonoha, who he sees on the bus on his way to school often.

Now, let’s meet Kotonoha:

Huh? What face?

Huh? What face?

Kotonoha is a quiet girl who’s afraid of boys, despite her… uhm, “figure”. And since Makoto is too much of a pussy to talk to her, who’s going to bring these two together??

Meet Sekai:

Cheaper then surgery, at least

Cheaper then surgery, at least

Sekai gets these two love birds together. But wait! She has a crush on Makoto! What’s going to happen??

Well, here’s the plot.
Right after Sekai gets these two teens together, they start dating. Makoto is quiet and shy, while Kotonoha is scared as shit to be around him (why she agreed to this, I haven’t a clue). Over time Kotonoha starts making sandwiches for Makoto, which I guess is a boyfriend/girlfriend activity. Now that I recall, she makes a whole box of sandwiches for him. Wow, what a lucky guy!

Hey Makoto! Do you like my sandwitches? Hey, listen!

Hey Makoto! Do you like my sandwiches? Hey, listen!

She really starts to open up to him. After a little while, Makoto does to, when they go on their first date. So, how did their first date go? Well, Makoto just did stuff he wanted to do and Kotonoha followed and smiled, while she was really just upset. He even tries to kiss her afterwords, in which she freaks out and runs away (remember, she’s afraid of boys, this subject was pushed on Makoto early on). Now that I think about it, she puts up with alot. I pity her. Sekai finds out about this afterwords and gives Makoto a good lecture on how to treat girls. She then talks to Kotonoha, who reveals to Sekai that she’s afraid of boys because she’s afraid one of them is going to sexually assault her, due to her bust. During their date, Makoto did some pretty dirty things, so she should be worried. Sekai responds that “he’s a boy!” and then does this:

I see.

I see.

So then Kotonoha meets Makoto later on and she kisses him. Makes alot of sense.
Afterwords their relationship improves, but then Sekai decides to help Makoto with sex, which is a little abrupt but whatever, so they do that, in which Sekai orders Makoto to use her for practice. Now Makoto starts cheating on Kotonoha with Sekai, because Makoto can’t hold his raging hormones and Sekai has a crush on him. This happens around episode 4. How long does it take for Makoto to tell Kotonoha about this? Around episode 10. I’m not kidding.
Sometime around after he says that, he also becomes bored with Sekai and starts having sex with half of the girls in the school. Sekai is pissed when she finds out, and telling him that she’s pregnent and how he needs to step up. Kotonoha, on the other hand, is depressed (well, she was for awhile) and when Makoto figures that out and starts to finally feel guilty, he decides to do the unthinkable: He helps her out.
Kotonoha confronts Sekai while she was at Makoto’s house, in which she stated “You seduced Makoto, so it’s your fault. Now we’re together again, like it should’ve been”. Makoto doesn’t say anything. So, what does Sekai do?

MakoPWN3D!!1

MakoPWN3D!!1

A little after that, Kotonoha finds Makoto, so she puts his head into a bag and shows Sekai while on the rooftop of the school. She then tells Sekai that she believes she was just pretending to be pregnant. So, Kotonoha stabs Sekai in the stomach, and when looking into her stomach, she then says “I knew it”. I found this comical, because while Sekai was stabbing Makoto to death, she kept yelling “YOU ONLY THINK ABOUT YOURSELF!!!!!”. During the last scene of the anime, we see Kotonoha (I’m so sick of typing her name) on a Nice Boat, hugging Makoto’s head. And it ends.

To summarize all this, it’s a pointless story with worthless characters. Nothing else in this title (such as animation, music, pacing, etc) stand out. The only way I can imagine this being worse is if Uwe Boll decided to adapt it into a direct-to-DVD film. Actually, that might give it some hilariously bad cheesy moments which would improve things. Nevermind.

I don’t think I need to further explain why this show sucks.

At least there\'s still the Nice Boat
At least there’s the nice boat.